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Simply..ghosts?

26/4/2018

6 Comments

 
There is a 'back story' (if I am using that term correctly) to my Venice trip which newer readers of Live Simply Simply Live may not know of..

My husband Barry and I had planned to spend a month in Venice in February 2016 and had done lots of research and planning and booked an apartment which was very Venetian. We wanted to know we were in Venice and didn't want to stay in a place which could have been anywhere. So the one we found  had a canal, a bridge and a private terrace with a view of this 15C church! You can see the apartment here.

When Barry died unexpectedly the owners of the apartment said they regretted they could not refund the deposit but would hold it indefinitely to be used by me or anyone I cared to give it to, and it went to the back of my mind for many months.
Picture
Little window on the terrace

As you can imagine it was with mixed feelings I went to Venice without Barry and to the apartment we had so carefully chosen. I know Barry would have been as thrilled as I was that our lovely Heather came along. She made it fun and a very healing and happy experience.


Last night I watched a production of Vera Brittain's Testament of Youth. In it, towards the end, Winifred tells Vera, who has suffered devastating losses at a very young age,

'All of us are surrounded by ghosts. Now we need to learn how to live with them. You must start at the beginning. Get up, get dressed, eat. Spring is out there, waiting...'

For me, Venice was out there, waiting, and I'm very glad I went to meet her.
6 Comments
Lindal
27/4/2018 12:59:52 am

Oh, well done for going, Freda, and even more well done for having a wonderful time. I'm sure Barry would be proud of you.
I am a firm believer in facing things as they are now. There is nothing that can be done about things that have happened, nothing to be gained from living our lives with blame or bitterness. (I say this as someone who lost both parents to cancer before my teens, so I know something about adjusting to new conditions in life.) Winifred Holtby was right. Spring is there for all of us lucky enough to grab it.
Incidentally, I had a great aunt who lost her husband in the Great War. Married, saw him off on the train on the day of the wedding, never saw him again. He is buried in Jerusalam. She lived to 100. That generation had it bad!

Reply
Freda
27/4/2018 02:02:35 am

I do appreciate your comment Linda, and that you speak from experience. I have the greatest respect for that earlier generation who bore so much with such fortitude, and carried on trying to live good livesl. People are amazing!

Reply
Mary
27/4/2018 02:08:18 am

I can only imagine that the trip, with all the myriad of emotions you (and Heather) must have felt, was ultimately cathartic; allowing you to fully embrace spring. xo

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Freda
27/4/2018 01:42:36 pm

Cathartic is a good word for how it felt and feels Mary.

Reply
Gail
27/4/2018 04:16:44 am

I appreciate the ghost quote. Get up, eat...that’s eventually how I overcame the paralysis of grief
Proud of you for taking the Venice trip

Reply
Freda
27/4/2018 01:45:40 pm

Thank you Gail. Someone described that paralysis or numbness as 'nature's anaesthetic' which I thought quite apt. I am so glad to hear you overcame it.

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