Ideally it doesn't involve airports and ungodly hours
The place I rest my head should be attractive, or at the very least clean and simple. I don't like to pay for lots of facilities I won't use!
I don't want to eat with strangers, and I hate making conversation at breakfast (am not very sociable at the best of times).
It has to be different enough from home to be stimulating. A new landscape to explore does it for me.
I have to come back with more energy than when I left.
The weather's not that important, which is just as well as all the above requirements boil down to self catering in the UK!
Log fire is a must.
What's your ideal simple holiday? Do share....