At Benmore Botanic Gardens today I was struck by the amount of blossom, white blossom, on quite large trees..

Clethra barbinervis has a delicate, pretty scent and an elegant shape.

Hydrangea paniculata 'Grandiflora' manages to hold its own against the gunnera in this lovely composition.

The euchryphias are smothered in scented flowers and buzzing with bees.
.

No blossom of course but I am always awestruck by the avenue of sequoiadendron giganteum. The seats just visible at the far end give you an idea of the scale!

Seen on a cafe wall today - made me smile.

Two paintings on their way to an exhibition..

The Blue Hums To The Yellow

The Cowal Open Studios Guest Exhibition will be at the Dunoon Burgh Hall from 9th - 30th September.

www.cowalopenstudios.co.uk/
https://www.dunoonburghhall.org.uk/


Being a full time artist was a dream which came true! (See yesterday's post.)

What do I do once I have achieved the dream?

Does my dream-life still thrill me?

Still suit my circumstances?

Maintaining the dream isn't as exciting as creating the dream so....

Can I adapt the dream?

Can I dream a new dream?

I could just stop dreaming...or could I?

Have you achieved some of your goals and dreams?

(One thing I will stop is whining about the rain. So sad for the people of Houston.)

..to various things I've found interesting lately about coping with change: from Diane Ackerman whose book Deep Play I am finding fascinating, Leo Babauta on starting over, and Hannah Ritchell on grief.

Trouble is they are coming up like this www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2011/apr/30/stroke-rehabilitation-love-story

and this zenhabits.net/startmeup/

and this hannahrichell.wordpress.com/2017/07/02/lauras-bench/#comment-2461

So messy!

And Weebly, usually so helpful, haven't fixed it yet, so I've just put them up anyway.

..I have decided, will be more of a pleasure and less of a chore.

The feeling of having a stock of home made dishes in the freezer is rather akin to having a good woodpile. Deeply satisfying.

I plan to have a smallish repertoire of easy, quick and healthy dishes, to keep a stock of good basic ingredients for a meal for any unexpected guests...I want to be a happier and more relaxed cook, a less grudging cook, a more organised cook, a more respectful and mindful cook, and I have accepted that if I want really good food (and I do) then I am going to have to make it myself.

And enjoy myself making it.

In desperation for some sunshine I have hung this painting 'Harvest' on the sitting room wall. it was inspired by the memory of a very hot and sunny day picnicking in a newly cut field..

The actual harvest here this year has not been a sunny one, but a very wet one. I took this photograph in the rain. Poor farmer!

Kondoing the cookbooks has been an interesting (and emotional) exercise. It has been about so much more than food.

The little Scottish book was given me by three teenage pupils (boys) when I was leaving to teach in England. I was so touched! The others are almost worn out and some were given by friends. Nigella Christmas I have given away - way too much fat, sugar and cream - even for me and even for Christmas!

The Complete Avocado Cookbook (still available) is lovely with recipes for every course including really good salads and this special dessert. Combine mashed avocado, whipped cream, beaten white of egg, chopped dates, honey and the juice and rind of one orange. Garnish with a little grated chocolate....Mmmm

Don't laugh, but I've just ordered a cook book! 5 Ingredients - Quick and Easy Food by Jamie Oliver.

Don't you think I was meant to have this one? It was surely designed with me in mind. Ticks all the boxes. And published just yesterday to coincide with the ending of my review of my cookbooks  :-)

The kind of cook I want to be..tomorrow...

What kind of cook are you?

These were all Barry's. I've already donated a lot under this heading, but will keep these in case I actually begin to really like cooking again and want to experiment. Who knows!

Just looking at these is reminding me of some lovely food experiences in different countries. In Sweden, where I shared a little house with two Italian students, Elvira and Titziano, who would have long discussions over the simplest of meals about how they were cooked in  their regions of Italy. Elvira cooked a 6 course meal from scratch for our Swedish friends (I assisted). Meanwhile the students back in Manchester were mostly eating Pot Noodles and carry-outs!

In Hong Kong, where Jennie and I ate in a restaurant where no-one spoke English. I still don't know what we were eating, but it was delicious and we struggled a bit with the chopsticks before I noticed that all the other customers - all Chinese - were using knives and forks. I think they were having a gentle laugh at us...
 
Venice: breakfasts standing up in a tiny bar on the street,  Cyprus: the tenderest meat ever, cooked overnight in an outdoor oven over scented wood and then cooked by the sun all of the next day... New Zealand: Death By Chocolate....What a nostalgia trip these books have prompted!

I'm off to dig out some photographs now.

What are your favourite food memories?

Starting from the bottom here - I learned a lot from Zoe Harcombe's Stop Counting Calories and Start Losing Weight and will keep the recipe book of these two for a few recipes which have become favourites, and one of my principles is not to count calories, or to totally eliminate any one food group.

French Women Don't Get Fat I have written about on 10.9.14. Sorry I cannot get the link to work :-(  (There are a lot of posts under Simply Eat if you have time to browse!)  Her light-hearted joie de vivre approach and emphasis on the pleasure of food makes the recipe book a keeper.

Lean for Life is my current favourite. Although I have given up trying her too-intensive-for-me six week programme I will incorporate many of her ideas and love her positive can-do attitude to health and fitness, and the recipes are lovely.

I will donate the top two as again I have taken on board what I want from them. I have adapted the 5:2 diet to have mainly vegetable juices on one day a week, two if my weight has gone up a little (there is a weight beyond which I will not go...)

I'm lucky  to gain only a couple of pounds now and then, but I'm pretty careful about only eating good, real food.

I just don't want to spend much time cooking it!


Meanwhile, the sun shone for a few hours today and the second brood of five baby swallows are about ready to leave the nest above the studio window. Yay!

I'll part with Quick Breads (I've found some nice Polish breads at the supermarket that I really like). Super Fast Food I have borrowed and may buy - lots of what I call assembling rather than cooking, and very healthy. (I still juice every day.) Carluccio's recipes don't sound so simple to me and I'll donate this one and stick to going to his restaurant when I can! Nigel Slater often uses slightly uncommon ingredients not easy to find here, but I shall try using these two books more. I'll donate the next two and keep the Jamie's - though the one recipe I tried and really liked (Blackened Chicken San Fran Quinoa Salad) took a lot more than 15 minutes!

The freezer is filling up....and it's still raining.

When I looked at the stacks of cookery books (see yesterday) I knew without a doubt that these were the ones which sparked most joy! I have made a mere two recipes from this collection, but I love them and they have inspired many a Primrose Picnic, Christmas feast, pretty table setting and  dinner for two.

Life mostly demands that we be practical and sensible and efficient, but this collection shows me for the romantic and fanciful soul that I am.

Food is about a lot more than fuel.

I'll be keeping all of these.

Do you have any cookbooks in this category?

Click on the pictures to dream bigger.

A think about the cook book collection. We all liked to give Barry cook books of course, but I did buy some for myself over the years. Mostly of the 'dream' kind with wonderful pictures..

Books with simple, easy or quick in the title would have been bought by me! For when I did take my turn (and I occasionally did) and for when Barry was away.

As were diet books.

There are some about foods from other countries.

And some I am calling the 'sentimental' category.

In true Marie Kondo style I will consider what I want my cooking life to be like, then see which of these books spark joy.

Barry died 18 months ago today. By some strange twist in time or in me it feels more like 18 weeks. Sometimes, if I forget and then suddenly remember, it feels like yesterday.

Thank you to Lotta who suggested, when I was moaning about seven more days of rain, that I needed a fun seven day challenge!

I decided to batch cook each rainy day.

This is a big move for me. I don't really like cooking though I love good food. You may know the story of Barry expressing an interest in cooking, and me teaching him all I knew and leaving him to it. (I knew quite a lot and could cook pretty well, I had just got tired of it I think.) Barry became a skilled and adventurous cook and gradually took over all the food shopping and cooking. Win Win! We both loved it!

It's hard to cook when your heart is broken.

And this is a lot of cook books for someone who hardly ever cooks....

Why do I believe that getting up early is virtuous?

I woke an hour later than usual this morning and my immediate reaction was 'Oh no!'. I actually, momentarily, felt ashamed.

Mrs Barbour taught her class of five year olds to recite this Robert Louis Stevenson poem, so it's clearly her fault! (I loved Mrs Barbour).

A birdie with a yellow bill
Hopped upon my window sill
Cocked his shining eye and said
'Ain't you 'shamed you sleepy head?'

Well no, blackbird. I just needed more sleep, thank you for asking.

I learned a lot about questioning my beliefs (which were often just early conditioning, not really beliefs) from Byron Katie's book  Loving What Is and found the chapter Doing The Work On Underlying Beliefs very freeing.

I came across this quote from Matthew Arnold..

(I am slowly composing my own version.)

..go away!

I am trying to be positive and noticing how beautiful are the raindrops on the agapanthus,

and how pretty it is on the geranium and how it sparkles on the cornus and brings out the scent of the homeysuckle, and between showers I have enjoyed sitting on the doorstep reading The Guernsey Literary And Potato Peel Pie Society, but truly, I am fed up with rain,

Rain is forecast for the next seven days!

..it does heighten the scent of the honeysuckle.

Both inside and out.

A flying visit to the Edinburgh Festival - good exhibitions here and here,  Sunday morning coffee in Carluccio's - I do like the friendly young staff there - and a bargain in Marks and Spencer.

I decided to have this £15 scarf and took it to the till. 'That will be £1.09 please.'
I argued (?!) but she insisted that was the price....

Love it!

A special birthday with a patchwork theme.

Quilt expert Maggie (we set up Quilter's Patch in York together) hung her favourite quilts around the walls of the prettily transformed hall where the party was to be held. We took the opportunity to photograph the collection the day before.

It was such fun being part of a team again, and I also had the nice job of doing flowers and candles for the tables....

Plentiful food and drink, music, family and friends to catch up with - the party, like the birthday girl, was amazing!

Thank you Maggie and family.

Do you have a place you think of as your second home?

Regular readers will know that I feel that way about the city of York.

I love this statue by the Minster.

That hand - so expressive of power, cinfidence, arrogance even. It makes me wonder about the man and his times and want to know more. Nowhere brings history alive for me quite like this city.

I was there for a very special party.

More tomorrow....

It can be as simple as moving your chair from its usual place....

A different perspective can clarify things and make decision-making easier. I moved my chair closer to the mini-meadow in the sunshine this morning and decided yes, I could open the garden for charity in 2018 with the Scotland's Gardens Scheme, as I have done many times since 2009. (See here and here)

I thought I could not do it without Barry, but I have help with the grass cutting and hedge cutting, and some wonderful gardening friends have agreed to assist. (I may be too late to sign up - am waiting to hear!)

Decisions left alone for a while sometimes seem to make themselves I find. I just wake up one morning and the decision is made. Do you find this?

A little plate of fried potatoes and the sun on my back, watching the swallows raise their second brood, enjoying the precious early morning silence - all these things are conducive to making good decisions. And ten days without 'news' probably played a part - bliss....

This reminds me of the famous Miss Jekyll but I am not wearing a full length Victorian gown, I'm wearing jeans and clogs!