Grief and grieving. Books have been written. I've read a few. Counselling is probably available. I've not done that.
I'm sharing here because this is something which is so present in my life. The pretty side of things I mostly show here is a way of balancing the grief and reminding myself that so much is still good and beautiful in my life. Death affects all of us and I think resilience and coping strategies could be talked about more. (The balance between privacy and public sharing is another kind of a balancing act that I think about a lot!)
For me now most ordinary days are fine. I have a lovely life: family, friends, home and garden, many interests and much to be grateful for. It's the extremes that floor me. The unexpected good news, the beautiful evening, a wonderful piece of music. When I got the good news about my eyes a little while ago I found myself standing in the middle of the garden next day with sudden tears just streaming down my face. When I got the news of a friend's serous illness I just wanted to lean against Barry. No words would be needed.
Things which helped? Reading about a bereaved child child who said 'Tears let the sad out'. The comment (from a reader here - (thank you Damsonlily) that you don't get over loss, but learn to live alongside it, and a neighbour told me that the spaces between the hardest times would get longer - she was right. The kindness of my blog friends has been a marvel.
I got very very curious about how my body could produce so many tears,,,,
It's no-one's favourite subject, and I mention it but rarely, but if you would like to share what you found helpful after a bereavement I, and many others, would be both touched and grateful.
Next post..JGID Week.